"The Truth Will Set You Free"-Jersey Shore S5, E9 (Recap)

Picking up from last Jerzday, Snooki and Vinny come back from their little date, and Pauly jokingly gets jealous! 

Deena has a thing for this kid Joey, even though he cancels on her last minute to go to Jenks. MVPD go out to Jenks, while the rest of the house stays home. Pauly randomly sees Angelina (who we haven't seen since she left on Season 2) says hi and keeps it moving. Unfortunately for Mike and Pauly, by the end of the night, their DTFs don't work out (Mike's girl is shy, and Pauly's girl has her monthly visitor!) What a shame.

The next day, Mike orders breakfast for the whole house. He doesn't have money to tip the delivery boy, and no one else in the house has any cash on them, so he gives the kid a protein shake mix. Later on in the day, it's revealed that Jenni and Roger are celebrating their one-year anniversary, and she wants to go all out for him. She heads to a sex store with Sam and Deena to set up a "romantic" night for him. In the car, Jenni and Sam voice their concerns about Deena messing with Joey. Deena is sick to death of hearing everybody talk badly about him, but maybe they have a point.

Later, Snooki, Ronnie, and Mike head to work, and Mike surprisingly wants to work. Meanwhile, Vinny and Pauly go out on a date. They complain about everybody being in a relationship. You're not supposed to fall in love at the Jersey Shore, and they are sick of it! Back at the Shore Store, Ronnie and Snooki go on break, while Mike stays behind to make a call to the Unit to set Snooki up.

While Jenni plans to use the smush room for her night with Roger, Pauly and Vinny steal the bed so it won't be used  for "couples' retreat". Sammi catches them in the act. They try to disguise the bed on the balcony. Jenni comes in and sees the bed missing and freaks, but it was a good prank. Jenni gets the bed back in, and decorates it with rose petals and all that. Roger comes and sees what all Jenni did, and loves it.

Later the crew goes out to Karma, and Snooki sees Jionni's parents. Meanwhile, Mike has invited the Unit to spill the beans to Jionni. I can't wait until this whole drama is over. It's not even interesting to me anymore.  Mike meets Jionni's family, and doesn't want to present the truth around them, because it will be too messy. Like this situation isn't messy enough. When Mike and Unit runs into Jionni, Snooki decides to leave with him before they have the chance to start anything.

Deena becomes annoyed with Joey, confronting him about whether he likes her or not. He tells her she can believe what she wants to believe. Eventually Deena walks away, only for another girl to come up and Joey tells her not to worry about Deena. Jerk off.

By the end of the night, Unit is really drunk, which messes up Mike's plan a little bit. What's worse is that Unit gets arrested for public intoxication. Mike himself admits that every time he plans to tell Jionni the truth, something happens. Maybe that should tell you something Mike. However, the next morning, when Mike calls around to ask about Unit, Jionni happens to be up while Snooki is still sleeping. Mike sees this as the PERFECT opportunity to tell Jionni that Mike hooked up with Snooki while they were together.

Next Jerzday: All hell breaks loose with Mike and Snooki! Joey comes to see Deena. And the house goes camping. Lord...

I have to say congrats to Snooki and Jionni! Snooki is supposedly pregnant with her first child! Crazy to picture her as a mom, but I'm sure she'll take care of her Baby Meatball just fine. And shoutout to Pauly D, whose new show, The Pauly D Project, premieres March 29th. YEAH BUDDY!